ETHICS

Posted on January 17, 2026

Where has the practice and art of being a good person gone? Every day the headlines display the lack of ethics in the political arena…Epstein files saga; tariffs on European countries opposing Greenland takeover; Venezuela chaos; Iran turmoil; ICE retaliation and confrontations; Kennedy Center MAGA takeover; Hand-Me-Down Nobel Peace Prize; Senator Mark Kelly lawsuit, et al. Simply, bunches of narcissistic, not objective, self-serving decisions not in the best interests of America and our long-time allies. As a two-year, Vietnam War, combat veteran with twelve years of U.S. Army service, the lack of ethics is disgusting and disappointing.

Wilber, et al, contend,

Integral Ethics, like any decent ethics, is the art of being a good person. It’s the practice of goodness in our everyday lives and includes all the ways of being truthful, authentic, caring, and courageous that continue our basic integrity. Integral Ethics also refers to the dimension of our lives where we must make difficult and complicated choices and nuanced judgments about what is right and wrong, acceptable and unacceptable, and quite often, unavoidably ambiguous. It’s where we must grapple with moral dilemmas, in politics, sexuality, health, relationships, work, money, and sometimes life and death situations. (Wilber, Patten, Leonard, and Morelli, Integral Life Practice: A 21st Century Blueprint for Physical Health, Emotional Balance, Mental Clarity, and Spiritual Awakening, 2008, Boulder, CO: Integral, 255)

Wilber et al, offer,

The short-term costs of unethical behavior are unhappy, contracted, and unskillful states of mind and emotion. The long-term costs of unethical behavior are worse—a vicious cycle of lies, self-contempt, and denial that erodes the foundation of our integrity and virtue. (Wilber et al, Integral Life Practice: A 21st Century Blueprint for Physical Health, Emotional Balance, Mental Clarity, and Spiritual Awakening, 2008, Boulder, CO: Integral, 273)

Terrence Real offers relational counsel,

FIVE CORE SELF-SKILLS, relational skills, for a well-adjusted, well-functioning person.

  • Self-Esteem

Dysfunction: shame grandiosity.

  • Self-Awareness

Dysfunction: disassociation; perfectionism.

  • Good Boundaries

Dysfunction: too porous (reactive); walled off (disengaged).

  • Interdependence

Dysfunction: overdependence; antidependent; needless; wantless.

  • Moderation

Dysfunction: immature (too “loose”); supermature (too “tight”).

(Terrence Real, How Can I Get Through to You, 2002. NY, NY: SCRIBNER, 203-204)

Vex King, Things No One Taught Us About Love, offers,

-we all have a past, which forms a large part of how we think today. How we were brought up, childhood memories, cultural beliefs, personal relationship experiences, the job we do-our mind is absolutely stuffed with preconceptions. What cultural, societal and parental influences were you raised on? What beliefs, traditions, customs or norms were imposed on you? (128; 131)

Ethics is an opportunity for joy, happiness, empathy, and freedom. And it is not a matter of recasting the entrenched sense into dutiful obedience. Synchronize the heart, the mind, the body, and the human biological systems; and reach out for others in a heartfelt, caring, helping, serving, and loving manner. Quality relational skills matter, and gratitude, trust, hope, and compassion can become a way of life. Life is simply practice and every experience has a purpose.

JUST SIT

Posted on January 10, 2026

Pay attention; feel; trust; have hope, gratitude, and compassion; let go; and do not lie, cheat or steal.

It feels like the country is a mess and that post truth, and consequently mistrust, it is bubbling with conspiracy, spins, lies, partial truths, and more lies! Simply unhealthy ego, work-in-process human condition, and evolution. Daily, media headlines unfold racism, police shootings, mass shootings, voting rights suppression, political party sorting and associated partial truths, Jim Crow laws in new clothing, immigration crisis, critical race theory, LGBTQ rights, gun control chaos, automatic weapons violence, and politicized measles. Americans are suffering, democracy is suffering, and the country is crossing the line of departure for a civil war, and more pain and suffering. Where have all the common good, virtue, compassion and love gone? A culture that deliberately creates human suffering is wrong! And each of us is expressions of our culture. Collectively, we can do better! Let’s move from me to us!

An analytical glance reveals a least common denominator to be polarization, nurtured by festering, unhealthy selves that unleash pain and suffering in many forms. Collective, interactive dialogue offers a breath of evolutionary optimism and hope for Americans to have productive, interactive, authentic dialogue, build coalitions, work together, and experience compassion as the antibiotic to confront this nasty infection. No one needs to suffer, and no one wants to suffer. A nice place to begin the journey from unhealthy self to the authentic self is to have fun buying some stickers. Catherine Price, in her Mindfulness Journal, recommends,

Buy a pack of small stickers—any kind will do—and place a dozen or so around your home and office in noticeable places, such as your bathroom mirror, your computer, the back of your phone, the wall behind your kitchen sink, your alarm clock, or the cover of this journal. Every time you see one of these stickers, STOP WHAT YOU ARE DOING, BREATHE, AND BE.

Yes, stop what you are doing, take a slow, deep breath, enjoy the present moment, sense the emptiness, zero, spaciousness, and freedom. You might want to consider putting stickers on your computer, the car mirror, or the bathroom mirror. And have fun picking out stickers: Hobby Lobby offered beautiful butterflies, and they work like a charm.

If you are not already a meditator, a recommended next step is that you find a meditation coach and start a meditation practice. If you have never meditated before, have fun with it and be patient. Try listening to music as you sit. To get you started, each morning practice sitting meditation for at least ten to twenty minutes. Find a comfortable, quiet place. You can sit in a chair, on a cushion, in your truck or car, or on the floor. When you sit in a chair, place your feet flat on the ground and sit upright. If you sit on the floor, sit in whatever way is comfortable: cross-legged, on a pillow, or on a meditation bench. Select a way that fits you! As you begin to take your seat, rock to the left and right, and then back and forth, to settle your buttocks. As you begin to settle in, sit with your head erect and your chin tucked in slightly. Put your shoulders back. Visualize your ears being aligned with your belly button; lift your head and neck as if they were being pulled by the sky. Find a comfortable position for your hands, such as resting them in your lap or one hand on each of your knees. You can sit with your eyes open or closed. If you sit with them open, lower your gaze, pick a spot on the floor in front of you, and let your eyes rest there. In sitting meditation, posture is like a foundation and is quite important for a resting mind: as the body goes, so goes the mind; as the mind goes, so goes the body. Good posture facilitates the easy flow of the breath, too. Pay attention, trust, and let go. As you settle into your chosen posture, spend a few moments paying attention to your breathing, focusing on each in-breath and each out-breath. Feel your abdomen expanding when you breathe in. Feel it contracting when you breathe out. Note how the breath tickles the skin between your nose and upper lip. There is nothing to be accomplished, nothing to be gained. Notice your thoughts, feelings, and perceptions. Do not attach yourself to them, and do not reject them. Just observe them, let them go, and keep breathing. Experience the thrill of just being with everything. If you find you are having difficulty staying focused on your breath, use the technique of counting your breaths as a support. Take one in-breath and one out-breath, and count one, in, out, and count two, and so forth, until you reach ten. Try breathing through the heart and out through the solar plexus to sync the mind and the heart. Once you have reached ten, count backward. Keep in mind that the point is not in getting to ten but in staying connected to your breath, being mindful of your breath. Pay attention, trust, let go.

Sitting practice offers a tremendous sense of freedom and peace. With daily practice, meditation can quite easily become a part of daily activities. The deep game is not about being dealt a better hand, but about playing the cards we are dealt with as much intelligence, care, and creativity as we possibly can. Now you are finally free to be the freedom you have been from the beginning. ‘Just this’ is the ultimate reward that comes from inhabiting the particular cartoon character you drew from this Kosmic deck of cards. Lao-tzu’s wisdom is clear, concise, and complete:

We join spokes together in a wheel, but it is the center hole that makes the wagon move.

We shape clay but it is the emptiness inside that holds whatever we want.

We hammer wood for a house, but it is the inner space that makes it livable.

We work with being, but non-being is what we use.[1]

Just sit; be transparent, authentic, pure, safe, all seeing, and feel the freedom. Simply be peace, be us.

[1] Mitchell, 11

GOLF IS A GURU

Posted on January 2, 2026

Why write Golf as Guru: Mindfullness, Awareness and Self-Restraint?

Golf opened a learning journey for this student of the game of golf, all the way from growing up in Northwestern Ohio playing golf with Mom and Dad, circling the globe, and arriving here in Arizona and simply working out at LA Fitness, playing golf, writing, and enjoying life. As the title and subtitle offer, the sport of golf has been a great coach and teacher; has evolved a concept of mind”full”ness; has breathed a peek at how mindfulness and awareness really differentiates professional golfers from average golfers; has fed the perfectionist personality; and has been a mighty fine instructor when it comes to the learned skill of self-restraint. It really is fantastic to remain sane after two shots in the lake to the right of the fairway! Everything is OK the way it is! All one has is now and the passionate intent to play the cards dealt.

A significant experience has been that if a golfer is open to new learning and is psychologically ready, golf offers infinite messages: at practice on the range; on the golf course; while perking reflections about the sport and relishing golf literature; during a work-out; and just sitting in silence and solitude to experience personal behavior in life and on the golf course. Sir Pelham Grenville Wodehouse, a widely read English author and scriptwriter, nails it: “To find a man’s character (and personality), play golf with him.” Woody and Birdy Ball, Golf as Guru’s entertaining characters, chuckle on every page as they think about playing partners and continue to dream about set-up, ball position, ritual (becoming one with the club, ball, and target), unconsciously squeezing the trigger, turning and tilting, the backswing, transition, forward swing with turn, tilt, hip-turn and pull, release, impact, extension, and finish; and contemplate smoothness, timing, tempo, and rhythm on every putt.

Golf as Guru is simply a thank you to golf as coach and therapist. It is indeed integral and reminds of General Douglas MacArthur, in the context of football at West Point, when he remarked, “Upon the fields of friendly strife are sown the seeds that at other times and places reap the fruits of victory.” If open to the challenge and opportunity, golf can be a guru.

PARTNERSHIP

Posted on December 27, 2025

Are you being heard, seen, and accepted?

Several years ago, Michael Brown’s The Presence Process: A Healing Journey into Present Moment Awareness, grabbed the attention with “I acknowledge my reflections in the world.” And today this statement goes much deeper after listening to Carl Jung’s video about love of a partner who minute-to-minute offers inner experiences. What are you seeing in the mirror as you contemplate the partner’s reflections? What has the mirror been offering your partner about your reflections in your partner’s mirror? How are you opting to show up in the world?

Today all inner experiences feel like reflections in the mirror… the challenge is to take the time to be with the experience, simply look in the mirror and be with the reflection, go deep, grasp, and accept what the reflection is offering; and behave and respond accordingly with next steps. When one authentically looks in a mirror the necessary changes that one sees can be owned; and if the desire is to accept the message and make a change (s), then move forward, accept the message, and make the change (s). Take 100% responsibility for the reflections in the mirror… life happens because of me, not to me.

What is the inner experience received? This is a good question with a complicated answer. To date, the inner experiences include psychological needs, biological needs, what is said-the words, and shadow-subconscious, mental chatter, emotional needs, physical needs, energy, cellularity, spirituality, sensual needs (smells, touches, tastes, sights, things one hears), and personality. That is a huge ball of wax! How can two folks ever hope to be good partners? With 100% responsibility and commitment to action by each partner that produces agreed upon results. Have to’s need to disappear.

Simply, be accepted, no need to perform to be loved. Be seen for not just behavior…notice the fears, the integrity, the virtues, the values, the trust, the hope, the courage, the honesty, et al . Listen first to be understood later, i.e., listen to the inner voice absent interruption. The relationship skills can come alive… the high self-esteem, the evolving self-awareness, the boundaries, , the moderation, and simply being together with the one you love and adore.

 

 

 

LOOKING IN THE MIRROR

Posted on December 19, 2025

Several years ago, Michael Brown’s The Presence Process: A Healing Journey into Present Moment Awareness, grabbed the attention with “I acknowledge my reflections in the world.” And today this statement went much deeper after listening to a Carl Jung video about love of a partner who minute-to-minute offers reflections, as opposed to projections… the wants, needed changes, the desires, the wishes, the visions, the complaints, the upsets, the anger spurts…What are you seeing in the mirror as YOU note and contemplate the partner’s reflections of John? What is beneath the projections? What is the mirror offering you? The words, the behaviors, the fears…the reality, the authenticity. How have you been seen, heard, and accepted? What has the relationship timeline and activities looked like during the phases of the relationship, the lust phase, the love phase, the parenting phase? Good questions.

The learning reinforces the genius of Michael Brown’s, “I acknowledge my reflections in the world.” Today all experiences are simply reflections in the mirror… the challenge is to take the time to be with the reflection, simply look in the mirror and be with the reflection, go deep, grasp, and accept what the reflection is offering, and behave and respond accordingly with next steps. When one authentically looks in a mirror the necessary changes that one sees can be owned; and if the desire is to accept the message and make a change (s), then accept the message and make the change (s). Blaming simply does not evolve anything and creates more of the same stuff… take 100% responsibility for the reflections in the mirror… life happens because of me, not to me.

What is the partner offering in the mirror? Insight with respect to relationship skills of: Self-esteem? Self-awareness? Boundaries? Co-existence? Moderation? Hiding with ego? That is a bunch to grasp. The power of love is empowering and can be revealing when one is open to receive it.

GENERAL CHARLES B SMITH

Posted on December 6, 2025

“Life is not a private affair. A story and its lessons are only made useful if shared.”

Dan Millman, Way of the Peaceful Warrior

 Following graduation from West Point in June, 1962, it was off to Winter Haven, Florida for a couple of months working at Cypress Gardens as a photography assistant followed by eight months at Fort Benning, Georgia…Airborne School, Ranger School, Infantry Officers Orientation Course, Jumpmaster School, 4.2” Mortar-Davy Crockett School…and then it was off to the first duty station, Fort Carson, Colorado, at the time, home of the 5th Infantry Division (Mechanized). The first assignment was 3rd Brigade, 2nd Battalion, 10th Infantry, Charlie Company, Platoon Leader, 2nd Platoon. The next assignment, Battalion Reconnaissance Platoon Leader, began on the day President John F. Kennedy was assassinated. Then it was on to a short stint as the Battalion Intelligence Officer, followed by the opportunity to serve as Aide de Camp for Brigadier General Charles B. Smith, Assistant Division Commander, Operations, 5th Infantry Division (Mechanized).

On June 25, 1950, the North Korean offensive struck, claiming the Republic of Korea Army had invaded North Korea. Subsequently, General MacArthur ordered the 24th Division from Japan to Korea. A delaying force, Task Force Smith, commanded by Colonel Charles B. Smith, was flown to Pusan, while the rest of the division followed by ship. Task Force Smith fought to the north and made its stand north of Osan. (A high school in Pusan is named after General Smith.) Lacking effective antitank weapons, Task Force Smith was overrun as elements of the arriving 24th Division, commanded by Major General William F. Dean, began delaying actions. For his heroic efforts while commanding Task Force Smith, Colonel Smith was awarded the Distinguished Service Cross, Silver Star, Legion of Merit, and Combat Infantry Badge. (Chief Editor Colonel Vincent J. Esposito, The West Point Atlas of American Wars Volume II, NY, NY: Praeger, Map 3, The Korean War)

The staff serving General Smith at Fort Carson was simple: a jeep-sedan driver, a stenographer, a military van driver, and an aide de camp. My introductory chat with General Smith was in his office and was quite simple. Lieutenant DeVore, when something goes haywire, I would like to have you tell me before anyone else does… and what a great life-long lesson that has been…no surprises offer comfort for those concerned. General Smith and his wife, Betty, treated my wife and I like we were their kids. Will never forget when my daughter was born General Smith dropped me off from his sedan at the Fort Carson Army Hospital to be with my wife and brand-new daughter…at the time Dads were not allowed in the delivery room at Fort Carson Army Hospital. When Betty made her trip to visit the new parents at our Fort Carson quarters, she arrived to tell us she had signed us up for diaper service. Wow! What could be a better gift for new parents than diaper service!

Scheduling for General Smith was a slice-of-heaven. Coordinate the schedule with folks to be visited, have the schedule typed and distributed, and coordinate the schedule and uniforms for the next day with General Smith and office staff. We visited a bunch of operational units during training exercises and inspections. Some interesting memories…

  • The 5th Infantry Division (Mechanized) played war games across the Colorado River with the 82nd Airborne Division from Fort Bragg. General Smith slept in the military van; the van driver slept in the front of the van; and the jeep driver and I slept in a mountain tent adjacent to the van. The rattlesnakes were huge, and I recall one day taking General Smith to a motel in Kingman, Arizona for a shower… a nice privilege that the field troops would certainly not experience.
  • An orientation flight in an F101-F jet from Canon Air Force Base, New Mexico was a neat experience. General Huston, the Administrative Assistant Division Commander could not make the trip to Canon Air Force. This offered the opportunity for the author to make the trip to Canon with General Smith, make a strafing run in an F-101 jet on a range at Fort Carson and have some fun…maybe… on the return trip to Canon AFB. The F-101-F pilot for my jet was Sam Schirk. I had met Sam when he was in flight training at Bartow AFB, Florida. On the return trip Sam did barrel rolls, loops, climbed straight up and tipped the nose of the jet, and down we went, breaking the sound barrier… I have fond memories of the G-suit compressing on my name-tagged flight suit, tummy, and legs… and it was about that time I needed to puke… fortunately, I was able to catch the vomit in my flight gloves, and I secretly dumped the gloves in the trash as we returned to the terminal at Canon AFB.
  • Playing golf with General Smith and guests at the Broadmoor Golf Club, adjacent to the Broadmoor Hotel, was always a blast. This hotel is close to Cheyenne Mountain Zoo, always a fun place to visit when in Colorado Springs, Colorado.
  • A fond memory is visiting the Northern Air Defense Command (NORAD) hard site that was under construction in Cheyenne Mountain. General Smith and I arranged the tour of the hard site during a visit by General of the Army H. K. Johnson, then Chief of Staff of the United States Army. During the trip into the hard site, we wore yellow boots and raincoats… lots of water on the ground and dripping…and noticing the huge springs that supported the buildings being constructed is an awesome memory.

Being an Aide de Camp for Brigadier General Charles B. Smith was an awesome job for a new Second Lieutenant. Daily, picked up from quarters in an Army sedan, pick up General Smith at his quarters, go to the Division Headquarters, prepare schedules, accompany the General on his visits, go to parties with General Smith, his wife, and my wife have offered wonderful memories and lessons that have been with me since June 1965. At that time General Smith and I chatted about our wonderful time together and agreed it was time for the author to go off to Vietnam for a first tour of combat duty.

Next steps were to move my wife and six-month old daughter to Florida to live near my dad for a year, make a six-week trip to Fort Bragg, North Carolina for Military Assistance Training for Advisors, and then it was emotionally off from Tampa, Florida to Military Assistance Command Vietnam (MACV), Que Son, Republic of Vietnam, as an Assistant Battalion Advisor for the Army of the Republic of Vietnam (ARVN) 2nd Division. Subsequent 2nd Division Advisor duties were Division Reconnaissance Company Advisor, Division Strike Force Company Advisor, and Division Air Intelligence Officer.

 

 

KIDS

Posted on November 30, 2025

Wow, what a journey…from playing with an orange road grader in the sand pile under an apple tree in the garden; to perfectionism, self-awareness and self-development, and performance-based self-esteem; to funk; and back to playing with an orange road grader in the sand pile under an apple tree in the garden.

As a kid growing up in Northwest Ohio—Sherwood, Ohio—hours were spent playing in the sand pile under an apple tree in the garden. A beautiful memory is playing with the orange road grader that was a Christmas present. Adjacent to the sand pile became the burial place for Tony, my beautiful, gold Persian cat who had been killed on U.S. Route 127 (Harrison Street) that motored North and South in front of the house that Dad had built and that Little John was taken home to after he was born in Defiance Hospital, Defiance, Ohio. The sandpile became a thing of the past when the two backyard hot rods needed a racetrack on the skirts of the garden and apple trees…however…

As working in Dad’s store, becoming an altar boy, and school became early priorities, A’s were rewarded with money and the need to perform and get stuff right became a way of life. Consequently, perfectionist, “heady,” emotionless, presented masculinity of the existing culture, and performance-based self-esteem became companions for many years of this wonderful gift of life’s journey. And the change-transition from this achievement driven life to retirement has been a monster, personally, for a dear intimate partner of fifty-three years and counting, for kids, and others. The word choice for this transition period from the military service and corporate America to retirement is “funk,” which, at times has felt mentally, emotionally, physically, energetically, cellularly, and spiritually never ending.

What is the current transition? The change from that “funk” of a learning, reflecting, experiencing, and evolving several years to an eventful return to the sandpile under the apple tree in the garden, simple presence with what is and that “… everything is an experience with a purpose.” (See Davey’s quote below.) Today it feels like a new beginning has begun to materialize, help parents help kids and help kids. Let’s peek by starting with a story from a former student, Davey, noted in The Gazebo Learning Project: A Legacy of Experiential & Experimental Early Childhood Education at Esalen. (Jasmine Star Horan, 2020, Big Sur, CA: Silver Peak Press, 144.) Davey offers,

I believe that I am a rare and lucky person in that my grandmother (Penny Vieregge) has taught at Gazebo for much longer than I have been alive. What I know about the philosophy, I know from the ways in which my ‘Nana” treated my brother and me. EVERYTHING IS AN EXPERIENCE WITH A PURPOSE [The capital letters are the BLOG author’s!]. For example, if we were to garden with Nana, my brother and I would dig the holes, we would plant the seeds, we would be responsible to water and maintain the beds, we would nourish the plants until we got to enjoy and share strawberries. We were able to understand the whole process and gain an understanding that our actions (that we can do on our own) can have a beneficial impact on our world around us. By doing and understanding we become capable and conscientious.

Pema Chodron, American Buddhist nun and mother, author of Start Where You Are: A Guide to Compassionate Living, et al, offers,

We work on ourselves to help others, but also, we help others to work on ourselves. The whole path seems to be about developing curiosity, about looking out and taking an interest in all the details of our lives and in our immediate environment. (The Gazebo Learning Project: A Legacy of Experiential & Experimental Early Childhood Education at Esalen. Jasmine Star Horan, 2020, Big Sur, CA: Silver Peak Press, 171)

Lucy Horan Drummond, a former Gazebo student, contends,

Kids were learning to be in touch with their emotions— (feel them)—and slow down and express them. We…learned good behaviors because we learned how to be in touch with emotions and feel our emotions; we grew up learning skills that other people had to relearn as adults. (The Gazebo Learning Project: A Legacy of Experiential & Experimental Early Childhood Education at Esalen, Jasmine Star Horan, 2020, Big Sur, CA: Silver Peak Press, 181)

All this boils down to the glaring, screaming, pleading need to help our children grow AWARENESS because degree— level— of AWARENESS differentiates folks. From this parent’s perspective, the more awareness for our kids, the better the prospects for overcoming the country’s confusion, chaos, conflict, terrorism, and nasty headlines. The obvious question: How can we help our young folks grow AWARENESS?

Step number uno is helping them learn to become present in the moment…simply learning to be mindful and present in the moment grows awareness for the child and the facilitator, parent, teacher, coach, or enabler. Folks are different and successful beings because of the degree of respective awareness and the level of awareness can grow and evolve with facilitation, help, enabling, and coaching, not directing, dictating, pontificating, being “heady,” and critical. Be present with the child, participate in what is going on in the moment, ask the right questions, grow the awareness for both parties…simply learning and reflection moved to experience and wisdom, consciousness, recognition, realization and knowledge of a situation…evolving and growing for both facilitator and child via process and patience, self-awareness and skillful dialogue. Jasmine Star Horan notes,

Rather than avoiding difficult feelings and situations…education can be used to experience and express the full spectrum of emotions, allow for productive conflict and communication, and to grow through self-awareness and skillful dialogue. (The Gazebo Learning Project: A Legacy of Experiential & Experimental Early Childhood Education at Esalen. Jasmine Star Horan, 2020, Big Sur, CA: Silver Peak Press, 181)

Some folks will watch what happens. Some folks will wonder what happened. Some folks will make mindfulness, awareness, and self-restraint education happen.  Let’s make this reality for our kids and kids around the globe.


GOLF AS GURU

Posted on November 24, 2025

The golf course has been a wonderful place to learn about and practice the art and science of mastering the self; health, wellness and well-being; and mind”full”ness, awareness and self-restraint. The game’s gifts reminds of General Douglas MacArthur’s words, uttered in the context of West Point, Black Knights of the Hudson football: “Upon the fields of friendly strife are sown the seeds that at other times and in other places, bear the fruits of victory.”

A recent journey, inspired by the golf instruction to trust the subconscious mind to swing the golf club, has been into the wonders and world of the subconscious mind. Little did I realize that the subconscious mind touches everything we think and do; that our character, personality, mentally and magnetism are expressions of the subconscious mind; and that we receive back the programming we have consciously or unconsciously offered to the subconscious. A frequent question has been: Why didn’t I learn about the subconscious mind in school? Two answers that have emerged are that folks want to control the evolution of the lives of others; and that awareness and understanding of the subconscious are subjective and not scientific. Consequently, as humans we wake up, grow up and show up through the conscious mind where only 10% of who we are exist. Unfortunately, we miss 90% of who we are.

Recent golf experiences with the power of harmony between the conscious and subconscious mind offers that trusting the subconscious to swing the club has resulted in playing golf that is the “funest” and “bestest” ever. The disposition and attitude about life and living are more positive, there is more patience, swing thoughts have become almost non-existent, and health, wellness and well-being have moved to the front of each day with mantras. A nice mantra is “Every day in every respect, I am getting better and better.” (Emile Coue’) If your desire and will are fired up and you are ready to learn more about the subconscious, Christian D. Larson’s The Great Within might work for you. Have fun, trust the subconscious and hit ‘em high and straight…be one with the environment, club, ball and target.


“EMOTIONAL SOBRIETY”

Posted on November 16, 2025

“Life is not a private affair. A story and its lessons are only made useful if shared.”  -Dan Millman, Way of the Peaceful Warrior

 The self-awareness and self-development journey started in 1973 when the new boss and I were walking in a new, two-piece, aluminum can plant…Coors Container Company, Golden, Colorado. While we were walking, the new boss recommended work on my personal stress. Having recently left a 12-year career in the Army and making the transition to civilian life, I agreed. Thus began 50 + years of self-awareness and self-development work… $85,000, seminars, workshops, ZOOM meetings, learning to meditate, conferences, books and more books, distractions, education, degrees, investment of time, searching for the next issue to tackle, et al. In 2025, an obvious “mind chatter” question has been, “Has the development and awareness journey been worthwhile?” Today’s answer: “NO.” Simply a trail of distraction. Why? The process has been outer development and has involved no childhood, parental impact, Little John, inner work; and the stress has remained.

The inner awareness trek began with the work of Ken Wilber, Terry Patten, Adam Leonard, and Marco Morelli (Integral Life Practice: A 21st Century Blueprint for Physical Health, Emotional Balance, Mental Clarity, and Spiritual Awakening) and the work of Dr. Joe Dispenza (Get Over the Habit of Being Yourself; Evolve Your Brain; and Becoming Supernatural), six months of energy psychology ZOOM coaching, reading many books, and most recently reading Dr. Aimie Apigian’s The Biology of Trauma: How the Body Holds Fear, Pain, and Overwhelm, and How to Heal It, and Dr. Tian Dayton’s Emotional Sobriety: From Relationship Trauma to Resilience and Balance.

 A lingering question has been whether it would make sense to enlist the services of a therapist and begin to be with and feel emotions. Dr. Aimie Apigian offered that the medical (physical body) and psychological-psychiatric (mental-emotional) professions had done a reasonable job in their respective professions; however, there was still a great deal of work to be done with human biological systems. And the more I learned about the human biological systems and the need for emotional sobriety, the personal issues with stress, neuropathy, and high cholesterol triggered inspiration to a new, “feels good” goal: To arrive at 102 years old absent issues with stress, neuropathy (feet and fingers), balance, high cholesterol, and statins; coupled with peace-of-mind (continued daily meditation with music) and connections and purpose created on a foundation of compassion. Simply a trek that links outer self-awareness and development to inner self- awareness and development. A glaring need: passionate intent, 100% responsibility (life happens because of me, not to me.), face everything, fear nothing, optimistic outlook, process perspective, and action plans…


SHERWOOD

Posted on November 8, 2025

“Life is not a private affair. A story and its lessons are only made useful if shared.”

-Dan Millman, Way of the Peaceful Warrior

Times have certainly changed from focus on community with others to deliberately created, enticed, and marketed distraction to accept less quantity and quality at a higher price. We are living through times that test our faith in humanity. Political division. Environmental crisis. Social fragmentation. It is easy to feel powerless or lose hope.

January 6, 1940, was the birth date in Defiance Hospital, Defiance, Ohio. When returning for a tonsillectomy and removal of adenoids in 1945, there is recollection of a high-fenced Japanese Internment Camp about a mile West down the road from the Hospital.

After birth, was taken home to Sherwood, Ohio to the home Dad had built while he was establishing a hardware-appliance store in downtown Sherwood, population 500 folks. Mom was Catholic, Dad was a convert…the Sunday routine was attending Mass at St. Stephen’s in The Bend…name chosen because of the curve in the Baltimore & Ohio railroad as it passed through The Bend. I recall during a Sunday sermon by Father Maumeister that a train blasted its horn as it approached the street near the church. My response from our pew was Beeeeee… Ooooooo… and deserved, parental discipline certainly followed. There are fond memories of learning altar boy, Latin prayers while sitting with Mom on the bottom bunk of the bunk beds where younger brother, Dan, and I slept. Many memories surface of serving Mass for Father Maumeister and Father Pfeifer. During a funeral one day, Dan Singer, a fellow altar boy, backed into a candle alongside the casket and set his white surplus on-fire. We scurried, put out the fire…no one was hurt…and on went the ceremony and burial in the nearby church cemetery. There are many fond memories of ceremonies during Easter week… Holy Thursday, Good Friday, Holy Saturday, and Easter Sunday. During a Saturday evening Benediction recall dumping the entire boat of incense on the altar floor…worked out fine, I used the boat spoon to scoop some incense from the floor and put it on the charcoal in the incensor being held by Father Maumeister.

The first allowance was five nickels in a matchbox; and at 10 years old started to work in the family hardware store. Sweeping the floor was a Saturday task, and it was essential to make sure all the sweeping compound was swept up because Dad would make the rounds for a quick and dirty check. Cleaning the 50+ weapons we inventoried and sold was also a Saturday task…Remington, Stevens, Savage, Winchester, Smith and Wesson…shotguns, rifles, pistols, and plenty of ammo, too.

Christmas was an absolute blast…annually, having attended the June Bostwick-Braun toy show in Toledo, Ohio with Dad to buy toy inventory, it was always fun to unpack the Christmas toys and put them on display during the Christmas season. A real highlight was installing the operating American Flyer and Lionel electric train displays in the front window. Selling Hoffert Christmas trees added to the Holiday fun. It was always fun to close the store at 5 PM on Christmas Eve and go home for family time, Christmas presents, the Christmas Carol on TV, and Midnight Mass at St. Stephen’s. Christmas day was always a day for relaxation, family, and lots of play with the anticipated Christmas toy.

Other duties at the store were many…helped with annual inventory, waited on customers, ran the store while Dad played golf on Thursday afternoons at Orchard Hills Country Club, unpacked and shelved merchandise, burned trash, made keys for customers…certainly wonderful years full of learning and making friends, all while playing Little League Baseball for the Sherwood Giants.

School for grades one through eight was at Sherwood-Delaware High School. Opted to go to Defiance High School to play football and attend high school. Graduated in 1958.

Reflecting on these early years has been interesting, and there are many more fond memories. As mentioned, times have changed…there was no internet, no cell phones, and we played together, we worked together, we knew all the folks in the community, we watched outdoor movies together, all the folks knew our family, we went to church and school together, we grieved together, we spent a lot of time with Gma, Gpa, Aunt Alvia and Uncle Ray and family…these were wonderful, focused times in my life…a life of simply being happy and getting ready for more life, and experiencing this marvelous gift.

Today, whether it is working out at LA Fitness, picking up groceries at Fry’s, or driving through our 55+ community, it is distraction personified…folks young and old on LA Fitness machines focused on phones, watching TV as they work-out…media, media, media, and more media, including AI. At home it is cell phones, TV, and personal computers.. Fry’s is wall-to-wall people, sparse greetings and conversation, and shopping. Watching folks in the parking lot is an education about lives motoring along ignoring all that is transpiring around them. The 55+ community is a resort community. Sixty percent of the community is “snow-birds,” who are absent for one-half the year. Candidly, naming more that seven neighbors is tough. Perhaps that is a learned, personal issue of not wanting to be bothered. Simply one of the numerous awareness changes noted since those happy, together, and community days in Sherwood… just seen, heard, and simply present.

Perhaps the peace-of-mind, purpose, connections, and compassion we cultivate within ourselves become the force that transforms our communities, relationships, and ultimately, our world. Distraction is easy. Happiness is not escaping difficulty, it simply requires presence with the self and others. Inner mindfulness and awareness can impact worldly healing and acts of kindness can help us evolve to a less distracted world with more “Sherwood like” childhood learning and creative experiences. Have a great day, love you!